Hello fellow fantasy football ‘ficionados! This is NOT the Loser’s Letter. I fully intend to win my game and be spared a second letter, in as many weeks. Rather, this is a proposal that I feel should be considered, following Sunday’s games. Also, I am alone in a hotel in Peoria and I’m bored and lonely. It’s already chaffing, so writing to fill my time is the only option.
It has been a painful 3 weeks of football (unless you’re a QB). The new quarterback “protection” rule just isn’t working out. We’ve seen Clay called on multiple plays that changed games, we saw Mike Daniels give Kirk Cousins a love pat and then let him throw the ball- both painful! If you’re not a Packers fan, though, who cares? Then we saw William Hayes. This man is out for the season, because he tried to abide by this new rule. To be clear, it seems that the rule is being called as written. It is just a well-intentioned, but dumb, rule. I, of course, have solved this problem.
The biggest issue with the rule is that it gives the QB an unfair advantage. Offenses certainly don’t need any more advantages, in the NFL. This rule is harming competition and could do worse. When have we ever seen a guy purposely miss a tackle? It is something of which we have not heard. For this reason, tackling the quarterback should be illegal and touching him with 2 hands should end the play. Before you dismiss this as hyperbole or overreaction, hear me out. I am serious.
If the goal is to keep competition fair and protect the QB, this is the only option. It is impossible to be tasked with tackling someone, while running as fast as you can, in addition to being tasked with avoiding falling on someone you are tackling. It cannot, consistently, be done. So, the NFL should give the hard-hitting sack-masters (shut up Chase) of the league an out. If you have the QB dead to rights, just two-hand-touch him. The QB doesn’t get hurt and the defense doesn’t lose their sack. It will certainly mean that QBs will not be able to escape as easily but, as stated before, the offenses in the NFL have enough advantages.
Now, let’s take into account the ethical issue of valuing one player’s health and well-being above another’s. Last week, William Hayes tore his ACL trying to avoid a penalty. In other words, a rule meant to protect player safety, did the opposite. While the QB has the greatest effect on the outcome of the game, he surely not more valuable as a person. I realize this is getting a bit deep, but this is the determination that has been made. Imagine where this realization could go, if the rule isn’t changed!
How long will it take for people to realize that QBs are mostly white? Before you know it, someone will be claiming that this rule is racist. After all, it disproportionately protects white people. I know this sounds crazy, but in a world where real injustices exist, some BS accusations get floated, as well. Before I piss off any large men, in interracial marriages, let me explain.
We live in a world where sexism and racism exist. We also live in a world where someone, somewhere, thinks everything is sexist or racist. Call out a woman for lying and you’re a sexist. Provide women with maternity leave, but not men, you’re a sexist. Employee 10 white people in town where the population is 100% white, you’re a racist. You get the point. These aren’t issues to belittle and I am not doing that. What I am saying is that this rule could quickly become an issue with which the league does not want to deal. Let’s stop watching bad football, focus on player safety, and avoid unnecessary accusations of discrimination. Let’s play some good, old-fashioned, schoolyard, two-hand-touch… at least with QBs.